[A chance to win!] Bunnies, Crafts and Scots, oh my!

Annette over at The Leveret's Nest is having a fantastic contest. Now, part of the entry is you tell your rabbit about it. Unfortunately, I don't have a rabbit in my home and I think Jade gets first telling to my furry godson Mickey. :)

So instead, I sat my lifesize Stitch plushy down on the futon and told him about it. He looked like he was going to gnaw on the futon, so I instead turned to Freddie Gerbil and told HIM about it. He asked if Annette makes any gerbily creations instead of all those stinkin' rabbits.  I said she probably does have mice, they're cousins to gerbils, isn't that close enough? (Gerbils are really, just desert mice.)

Freddie seemed unimpressed. He'll be even less impressed when he learns I've sent oats to Wesley in bribe.

[Bunny Influence] A strange thing happened to my calendar..

The buff coloured lop dashed out of the closet and down the hall, taking a sharp turn into his friend's room. He dived into Jensen's hidey and said, quite sternly, "If anyone asks, I was here all afternoon!"

So, a strange thing happened today..

I have my bunny calendar up in my bedroom so I woke up all month to Micks's handsome, fuzzy, face. When I woke up this morning I realized it was the last time I'd see him for a whole year. I did contemplate just leaving it at May, but figured then I'd just confuse myself. I contemplated taking Mick's picture out and putting it in a frame. I flipped the month and decided I would go drink tea.

This evening when I was putting away my laundry I noticed December was lying on the ground. I looked at it funny, picked it up, put it on my bookshelf to deal with later and went back to laundry. The next time I looked, September was also on the ground. Wondering what was going on, I picked up September (through November, as it turned out) and turned the calendar to see what was going on. That's when everything but Mickey's picture (and those before it) fell off the wall and at my feet.

I picked everything up, but I couldn't find the page that was May's Days on the front, the June bunny on the back. No HUGE loss, I supposed, I'd get to see Mickey for an extra 30 days. So I fixed the calendar, put it back up the wall, turned around and there was the June bunny sitting half under my bed, pretty darn visible. I looked back at the calendar, but Picture Mickey was giving his best, most innocent, look.

I'm sure if questioned he'd claim no involvement.

[Gerbil Video] Freddie is a Sailor.

Sorry for the wobbles, bit that the ferry crossing was rough, bit that my hands shake. But this is Freddie travelling, as you can see, he's completely bothered by car rides, ferry rides, etc etc. Actually the only time I've seen him upset while travelling is when I dared to eat a cheeseburger (with lettuce instead of the bun :P ) for lunch. I'm not sure if he was upset because I wasn't sharing or because I was eating meat. I lean towards the former theory though.

[Not Quite So Random Anymore Story] No Stampeding Cows.

[Part One]

[Part Two]

[Part Three]

So, let's talk about something that isn't Goat. Because, I'll tell you right now, while we were sitting in Cowtown (Calgary to you non-western Canadians) airport, I was doing my best to ignore his existence right off the planet. Tim Hortons can fix many ills, but it can't fix a man with funky eyes staring at you flatly trying to make you answer questions he hadn't gotten around to asking yet. I'm going to do my psychic bird routine and guess what questions you have, because I sure as heck wasn't wasting the effort on one of Cougar's friends.

Let's see, first up, if the avatars of beings of powers exist what else exists is probably top of the list. You probably want to know about werewolves and vampires and stuff like that. Werewolves, yup, met a few, they're cranky ass bastards, but then, they're Wolf's warriors. He imbibes worthy beings with his spirit and they go fight his cause. Or just fight. A lot. Can any of us do that? Sure, in theory, if we have the power to spare. But seriously, what am I going to create? Thieves who can't fly because they're too big? Please. It's be just a giant waste. I have no idea about the vampires, that's a European thing, and as you can guess, I don't get over the Atlantic much. Actually, its kind of an Asian thing to, I'd believe it more likely over there, they have strong beliefs.

I have met ghosts. They're really not much fun at all. Totally depressing, either they're all in your face about them being dead, or how they died, or they want to kill you so you can keep them company in their misery. I may not be able to leave a ghost, or at least I don't think I can, but dying hurts and I don't want to do it.

What else? Uh, is there God? Sure. Possibly several, possibly one who has a thousand faces, possibly a guy who controls all our actions and makes it look like free will, or maybe a girl who sparked life to the universe and went on vacation. I'm just a power brought about by imagination and faith, I can't say any great being has hopped over and said "Hey, Magpie, we should totally do lunch." Besides, I'd not trust anyone who claims to be that powerful, I'd think they're just selling something. Everyone's selling something, hell, I'm hoping this'll make for a great book thought fictional and make me thousands. If you bought this copy instead of pirating it, be nice and buy a copy for your aunt's gerbil or something. If you pirated it, well, I'd be choked, but I'm more happy of proof that I made it through all this.

Yes, I eat, drink, pee and poop. See memo up there about dying hurting. No one enjoys it. Well, okay, I don't know for a fact that NO ONE enjoys it, but anyone who does is too sick a kitty for me to want to hang around with.

I don't know if every being has a purpose, but I can tell you every being has a favourite song and some even have the same favourite song for more than a day. Having a singular favourite book is like having a singular favourite flavour of ice cream. Sure, you might blurt 'strawberry' but if someone hands you a bowl of 'maple walnut' you'll be all 'Oh! Yum! I love this!' It's the same for books. Movies, I don't watch a lot of. I don't know why, I guess I just have trouble sitting still for that long unless I"m with someone else and the fidgeting would drive them bug nut crazy.

Bunnies are awesome. Yes, I got paid to say that. It doesn't make it any less true though.

Do other places have avatars of their own? Sure! Why not? Do humans stop imagining and believing and whatevering just because they're not on the North American tectonic plate? Please. I wouldn't be surprised if you find a guy sitting on an ice shelf with a cigar, gnawing on a raw fish and trying to explain the language barrier between penguin breeds if you went down to Antarctica. Actually, sign me up for that vacation, it could be a fun lecture.

Do I know Coyote? Not personally, don't have his phone number, he's been running around in eastern Washington state lately, and I don't cross the 49th as often as I used to. Climate change is a bitch.

I think that's the major points. Or at least, the ones I can think of for now. I'm sure once people figure out my Twitter I'll get a bunch more. Of course, that'll be a bit late for this story, but hey, I have dreams of sitting on my ass, fondling a keyboard and making millions. It won't happen, but a girl's gotta have dreams. Or boy, if I die between now and then, I never quite know what I'll come back as.  But me, I"m gonna continue ignoring Goat, get on a plane and wonder why the hell I ever agreed to go to Toronto in the first place. I mean, its not like Bear's THAT persuasive. Why couldn't Horse go to Toronto and I could go back to bed?

If Goat didn't believe in hell before this, three hours on a plane with me, heading to Toronto, should pretty much convince him it not only exists but he signed his own name onto the transfer slip. I'm almost cheerful about getting on that plane. Y'know, if almost were the bowling distance between Yellowknife and Iqaluit.

[Bunny Stories] Maddy, Umbra, The Doctor and Wonderland.

Umbra peered over Maddy's shoulder at the slightly nibbled around the edges paper. The mixture of colours, lines and arrows probably made sense to someone, but she was more of a live it, see it, learn it type navigator. She didn't think Maddy was having much better luck.  They'd come out of a rabbit hole in the side of a large, grass covered, hill. It was nothing like the closet it was supposed to have been.

"You probably should have taken a left at Albuquerque." A voice told them as a shadow loomed over them. The two does barely had time to do more than turn before a humanoid in a strange British uniform crouched down behind them. "Or maybe that was a right. It depends on where you're going, I suppose."

The two rabbits wriggled noses at each other rapidly, both prepared to bolt. "He has a stick of celery." Maddy pointed out as they eyed the rather monochrome outfit.

"He smells like Mickey's Doctor." Umbra sniffed at the man who was looking rather amused. "Well, sort of half like Mickey's Doctor."

"I don't have a Mickey, perhaps I'm only half the Doctor you're looking for?" He said with a smile and a tilt of his head. "Did you want the celery?" He took it off his coat and offered it to Maddy.

She made a quick snatch to start munching on the leaves.

Umbra, having had a handful of oats before she left only made a polite nibble before turning back to the stranger. "Thank you," she said politely. It didn't appear Maddy was about to thank him for the snack! "Are you the Doctor? Or maybe one of the Doctors? Are there more than one?" She sat up on her haunches so she could peer at him better.

"There are several and they are all me." He replied, shifting to sit cross-legged on the ground. "But the important thing is.. where is it you're trying to go? Perhaps I can help you get there, as long as it's not Heathrow, it shouldn't be a problem." He grinned as if she were supposed to understand that.

"Disneyland!" Umbra replied, grabbing the map to turn it about for him.

"Well," Maddy said between chews, "Actually," she swallowed, "We want to go to Wonderland. Disneyland just happens to have the tunnel into Wonderland."

"Ah." He said as if this explained it all. "And getting all turned about in the portals are we?"

"Portals?" Maddy asked.

"I think that's British for 'door'" Umbra said in a stage whisper. "Speedy'd know!"

"Those too." The man agreed.

"I wish Hannah were here!" Maddy said with a thump, "She'd understand all this is the Doctor, isn't the Doctor, tunnels, portals and celery stuff! She's all nerdy scientific!"

"Well, I think I can manage the scientific." He said, "And I am, indeed, The Doctor. Perhaps not the Doctor you will know, but I am still the Doctor."

The girls exchanged another look. Umbra shuffled up to him and peered up with her widest eyed look, "Uhm.. So you have a TARDIS?"

The Doctor looked at her suspiciously, smile failing to falter, "I do indeed have a TARDIS. I'm not sure it'll get you to Wonderland, however."

"Does your TARDIS really have a garden in it?" Maddy asked, leaving the stalk of celery unchewed, grooming her mouth in appreciation for the yummy celery leaves.

"It has everything it wants to have," He replied. "So I suspect, if the TARDIS wants a garden, the TARDIS will have a garden."

Noses wriggled. "We did promise Hannah we'd try and get that watch for her Mom." Umbra said.

"But.." Maddy scritched a hind foot to the base of her ear, "Mickey told us all about the garden!"

"Mickey tells a thousand tales. I'm sure some of them are even true!" Umbra pointed out.

"Hmph." Maddy said, all fours back on the ground.  "Well Mister, possibly a doctor, probably The Doctor, if you would be so kind as to give us invite onto your TARDIS, I'm sure she would be feeling kind enough to send us on our way. She's very smart."

"She?" he queried, brow furrowed.

"The TARDIS!" Maddy exclaimed, rather indignant.

"AH." He replied without further observation. He stood up and dusted off his cream coloured trousers. "Well, I suppose we can ask .. her." He said with bemusement, "The worst that can happen is we end up a thousand years in the future, looking for a good book." He turned back the way he'd apparently come from, "Come along, then."

Umbra grabbed the map and stuffed it in a bunny sack before joining Maddy in hopping after him.

"But if we go a thousand years in the future, won't you meet your future self? I mean, the one Mickey knows? 'Cause if you don't know Mickey.. its either because you haven't met him or you haven't met him yet, or maybe you won't meet him because you're not his Doctor, or.." Maddy trailed off and shook her head, "I'm getting a brain ache."

"Takes a real problem with time for someone to meet themselves," the Doctor told her as they rounded a corner and gestured to the blue box resting almost against the hill. "Don't mind Tegan, she's a bit cranky." He warned as he opened the door. "It's hard to resist asking you a thousand questions about my future self. I wonder how far down the line he is."

Umbra looked up at him as she followed Maddy into the TARDIS. "You're making about as much sense as people who drink poisoned water." Her humom had been watching a show all about it before Umbra'd snuck out.

"Poisoned water?" A female voice said from inside. "Who's drinking poisoned water? And what's this Doctor? Rabbits? What's next? A Cheshire Cat?"

"Oh, I hope so!" Maddy interjected.

"Yes.. Poisoned water!" Umbra said looking up at the woman, "You know, take perfectly good water, heat it until it bursts, then stick foul tasting leaves in it until it turns an awful shade of brown!"

The woman raised an eyebrow at the rabbits and looked at the Doctor who was closing the door, "They're complaining about tea."

"Then we best not serve them any." The Doctor replied. He strode across to the console and started playing with settings.

"It's very white in here," Maddy said, looking about.

"Yes, well, don't leave any brown!" Tegan ordered.

The girls rolled their eyes. "It's just Mickey was bragging about all the bits and bobs."

"Who's a Mickey and why do we care?" Tegan asked.

"He's a boy - and .." Maddy trailed off, "I don't know."

Umbra hopped over to the Doctor. "Maybe you could ask her nicely to take us to Disneyland?"

The Doctor smiled and winked to Tegan. "Dear TARDIS, please take us, and the rabbits, to Disneyland." He then threw a button.

There were all sorts of things moving and whirring for several minutes before all became quiet again.

"Just a short hop, I see." The Doctor said before pulling up a view screen. 

"Don't mind him, he thinks he's funny." Tegan told the rabbits.

Upon the screen was a twisty turny forest, and on a low lying branch was a low lying cat with a mile-wide smile on its face. It waved a paw to them.

"Bloody --" Tegan stopped herself before she finished the profanity, "That's a Cheshire Cat!"

"So it is." The Doctor said, rather nonplussed.

"Oh, even better! Thank you TARDIS!" Maddy gave the bottom of the console a quick groom before dashing to the door, Umbra following suit. The small lionhead thumped a foot. "Well? Are you going to open the door or not?"

Tegan grinned, "Yes Doctor, are you going to open the door for the rabbit, who is apparently in quite the hurry. Perhaps she's late?"

The Doctor shook his head and opened the door, the two girls disappearing down the path, shouting back their thanks and appreciation.  He turned to Tegan, "Did you want to go explore Wonderland?"

"No, I want to go to Heathrow." She replied and then sighed, "But as that seems to be impossible, let's go find a tea party. I could use a cuppa.. no matter how 'poisoned' a bunny may think it may be!" The stewardess picked up her handbag from beside the door and marched out.

The Doctor looked at the console and patted it a little self-consciously, "Thank you," He said after a quick look about to see everyone was out of ear shot. He then tilted his head to one side, studying the monitor that the cat had disappeared from, "I think."

[Human Blitherings.] A Ramble about Introverts.

I think the most important thing to any introvert is a safe place to retreat to. It has to be a place that other people can't enter without the introvert's cooperation; whether an office, a bedroom, an apartment, it has to be theirs and theirs alone.  There needs to be a place that they can be left alone and feel no pressure to be with anyone else. A place whether they can do what they want, to refocus, to reenergize and be themselves. I'm not saying noone is welcome, typically a partner who can humour the introvert's ways is welcome, as is any family who does the same, but for the most part, it's very much theirs and respected to be their space.

Introverts, by nature, either are "on" or "off." The "on" mode is the mode they take when they're around others. The stereotype is introverts are antisocial, but the truth is far from that. I am an introvert and I'm quite social. I'm happy go lucky, I like meeting people, I love talking with people, I love travelling, I enjoy new experiences. But, all of those things take energy from me and I need a time and place to recharge. When I don't have that opportunity to recharge I become, quite rapidly, like a caged animal. There are some who don't bring out that need to perform, to expend energy. There are people who I can trust to just sit and be without expecting anything of me. They don't pester with questions and wanting attention, they don't try to engage, they just let me be. Partners who don't respect that tend to go out the door pretty quickly. My family recognizes this and mostly respect it. It would be easier, of course, for everyone, if my brother and I's introvert cycles were ever in synch.

I'm told extroverts get their energy from exchanging ideas and being with people. I find that drains my energy and I need time to myself to recharge. It's why I rarely stay with others for long; that private space is impossible to achieve. Even if your hosts leave you be, there's still an expectation of socialization. While I am a performer at heart, I love to entertain whether with verbal or written stories and humour, there's only so much steam in the engine.  Often when I get home from travel I lock myself in my home for as long as I can get away with before I wander back into the world of the social. The fact that I'm in pretty sorry shape physically after travelling is a happy coincidence.

I'm told I'm a good counsellor; a good listener. The problem is, when someone just keeps treading over the same ole ground over and over I get bored and restless. It's very hard for me not to say "Do you even listen to yourself?" Or when people feel the need to point out what I consider obvious, I find it hard not to say "Yeah, and?" I don't deal with ego well, which is humorous since I have quite the ego on my own. I don't deal with negative attention whores (those who need attention and will steal it at any cost and do not like others to have attention) well. I've never quite worked out if it's an introvert trait to be the unwilling counsellor to every Tom, Dick and Harriet, or if it's just a me trait.

I've noticed most bunny people tend to be introverts, I think it's probably because that rabbits themselves tend to be. Look at how long it takes them to accept somebun new to their territory! They too require their safe retreat where they don't have to deal with anyone or anything. They too have their time of "Yeah yeah, talk away, just don't expect more than grunts in reply."

Sometimes I wish I could have a way to express the need to be left alone without offending. Extroverts just don't understand, I won't say they don't *try* to understand, but I've yet to find any extrovert who doesn't sit near the introvert personality line who groks it. How do you say to someone "I don't want to deal with humanity at the moment, how about tomorrow?" without them taking it personally? It's not that we introverts prefer our own company, it's just that sometimes we need our own company with no expectations or wants from others attached.

I think it all boils down to introverts need freedom. We need to be able to flap our wings and fly into the sky, to soar and sail, to do as we will, to be free. We also need someone to land for and to be with. Sometimes I think a great reality show would be "Introverts and the poor bastards who love them."

[Random Fiction] Magpie's Flight - Part Three

Post One
Post Two

I tried the whole 'take a deep breath' routine and found that it just wasn't working. My fingers were digging into the armrests (The lady in the middle could fight me to the death for the 'shared' armrest if she wanted) and made me glad I'd had to flap my sorry self all over the place; I was far too drained to accidently shift and plunk talons through the upholstery. I wondered how quickly after take-off I could convince a steward to bring me vodka. I really should have thought to go first class. Or just order a gold card in Horse's name.

I did mention I hated flying, right? I'd been trying to figure out how it was I was sitting in a tin can about to be launched into the stratosphere (or whatever sphere) when Bear and Horse were probably driving, the lucky bastards, to the oil fields. Let's face it, Bear was the oldest of the spirit incarnates I knew, so on his part it was probably just not considered chauvinism. It probably wouldn't occur to him that a girl could work in a mucky, icky, male dominated field. Horse, on the other hand, was a chauvinistic bastard and think that a girl couldn't possibly dirty her fingers with a wrench. How he'd known me for a few hundred years and not figure out how BS that was was beyond me.

The lady in the middle seat stood up and moved and someone else plunked down in her chair. I turned to find myself staring at in the strange yellow eye of Goat. I can't say I'd ever met him before, but we recognize our own. The square irises also kinda gave it away. "Uh," I said brilliantly as I pulled out my ear buds. So much for NOFX as comfort music.

"Good afternoon Miss Magpie," he said with an ironic smile and a raised eyebrow. "A certain cat has sent me as intermediary. He offers his apologies for damage to yourself and his home."

My eyes narrowed, and if my hands hadn't already been placed back in their death grip of the chair arms, they'd probably have clenched. I was about to tell him to get the heck off the plane, but apparently he'd boarded just before they closed the doors as the stewardess had launched into the safety speech no one listened to anyway. I was trying to think of something else to say that wouldn't get me in trouble, but failing.

"He offers explanation of trauma of coming home to a rather dead lover and possibly a mental box trap." Goat turned a smile at the steward who had come to tell him off for talking through the safety lecture. The steward apologized to Goat and backed off.

"You have GOT to teach me how to do that," I said in awe.

He smirked, "Just be more stubborn than anything else on the planet and hold that in your eyes when someone comes to pick a verbal." He cocked his head to one side, "Said cat says he will take feed and clean up after your cat as penance. She, apparently, landed on his head claws out and tried to rip off one of his ears with teeth."

Okay, I couldn't help the smirk of that mental image, even if it had a near suicidal move on Miss Fluffikins' part. "How do you know Coug?" I asked, and then realizing our location, "Craig," I corrected myself.

He snorted, apparently ears listening didn't bother him. I just hated being interrupted by people wanting to know what cult or gang you were in that you called all you friends by animal names. "He liked to hunt on the north shore. He doesn't anymore."

I opened my mouth and nothing came out. I closed it and opened it to try again. "What did you do?"

"I pushed him off a cliff." Came the reply. "I'd be sympathetic if he had been hunting for anything other than sport."

Okay, that won me over. Anyone who shoved Cougar off a cliff was okay in my books. "Too bad you didn't off him."

"Too agile." He crossed his arms, "Now, is that a you've forgiven him? I like to finish one task before I start another."

I sighed. "As long as my cat is still alive when I get back, I guess." I mean, I'd thought myself that he'd been jinxed, but still. Why'd he blame me? Who'd cursed him and why? I mean, I was an irritant at worst to the guy, I know there were people out there he actively hated. It would have to have been a pretty specific hex. "You're really going all the way to Toronto for this?"

"Sure, why not? Consider me Cougar's replacement in the quest for clean lands and justice for the underdog." He blinked slowly, which was just creepy with his square irises. "Oh, and I suppose if you need a mundane name, you can call me Gage."

"Maggie," I replied. All my enthusiasm for talking was stopped when the plane's engines went from taxing speed to starting its run down the runway to try and conquer Newton by throwing itself into the sky at hopefully fast enough velocities. I closed my eyes and tried not to swear.

"Don't like flying, huh?" was Gage's oh-so-helpful observation. "How strange for a bird."

"I have no problems flying when it's my wings," I growled back. Why is it everyone thinks I should adore being incased in metal and thrown into the atmosphere at high velocity?" I didn't quite growl and I'm sure the sarcasm was dripping all the way to the carpet.

"Probably because it's less work for you," was his reply to the rhetorical. Apparently he was happily ignoring my sarcasm, so I decided to happily ignore him. Only an hour till we landed in Calgary and I switched planes. Maybe I'd luck out and mister cheerful flier hadn't bought a connecting ticket. Of course, considering what my luck had been like lately I highly doubted it.

I could have strangled him when he started to snore. How the hell could he sleep at a time like this?!