Monday, March 31, 2014

[Lorna Grumpy] The Saga of the Running Children.

(Do you know how difficult it is to find a picture of kids running indoors??)
The unit down the hall from me has two children (with a third on the way.)  Their kids run down the hallway to the elevator and mash the buttons. They then mash the buttons in the elevator. They sound like a herd of buffalo when they go down the hall.
I thought I was just being too quiet so I wasn't masking the noise of their noise very well. So, I moved my bedroom around so my head was beside the outside wall, I put a fan between me and the door to the hall, and typically have music playing non-stop. I switched which way I lay on the couch so my head is at the outside wall, I have a fan between me and the door and I have music between me and them, although the TV isn't. I still can hear them pounding up and down the hall. The vibration is as bad as the noise. I can hear them when I have my headset on and am streaming hockey.
I have fibromyalgia. I sleep when I can as I can. Often that involves being woken up by the kids as they run down the hall. The barking dogs out back don't wake me, the power tools of home reno don't wake me, the vacuuming of the hall doesn't wake me, but the kids do. I'm also an introvert so I loath confrontation. I put off, for as long as I possibly could, saying or doing anything. The final straw was when I was on Skype with a friend and I got a 'What was that??' and I said 'the Kids from down the hall running to the elevator.' I've written at least four letters of complaint, the head of Strata talked to them on more than one occassion. The Mom said she'd take the stairs, the Dad didn't seem to care one ioata. Now, her taking the stairs doesn't seem a practical answer to me, but whatever. I'd have thought the better measure would be to teach the kids not to run in the hallway. Head of Strata said he's not here when it happens, I'm gonna have to talk to them myself. (He put it way nicer and diplomatically, but that's what it boiled down to. The harshness is me, not him.)
So, fine, today, when the kidlets when pounding down the hall, I went and found clothing, and opened my door to ask them to ask their kids to not run down the hall and I got told "They're kids, they're run. How do you ask them not to run?" Which sounded like a get out of parenting excuse. I realize that kids have energy, they need to burn energy, but do kids in school not manage to learn "Don't run in the halls"? I didn't have to be taught that in school since I already knew it! And I started school at the age of four! Maybe I'm overestimating the abilities of a 3 - 4 year old? Isn't there a certain behaviour for certain places rule book? Don't you teach kids these things?
So I ask, how would you / did you, teach your children not to run indoors?

Sunday, March 23, 2014

[Freddy Update] Little Old Man.

Freddy is at least three and a half years old now and he's definitely slowing down. He doesn't run up to the top his cage anymore and he's starting kicking all his food out of his bowl that lives up a tier so he doesn't have to travel up as often. Of course, his water bottle is still up there, so perhaps I should move it down to the main level. I'm just not sure if that would help or hinder at this point. His fur is no longer as plush and he doesn't always open his eyes all the way as he meanders about his cage.

When I present him with treats he just gives a morose look until I move my hand to him. This, however, could just be a gerbil training his pet human to be more considerate. I put a piece of popcorn down beside him today because he didn't seem particularly interested in taking it from me. He just had more interest in sleeping.

He's sleeping most of the day away now, being active mostly around dawn and dusk. He could be running around half the night and I wouldn't know, but I suspect not. He just seems tired and sleepy most of the time.

He's still friendly, happy, and cheeps, he's just slowing down a lot. Poor little guy, obviously needs a few more pumpkin seeds in his life.

Friday, March 21, 2014

[Thank you] Dental Donators.

Thank you so very much everyone who helped to make my dental goal and enable me to get my teeth fixed without going deeply into debt once again. It means so very much to me that people who are facing their own financial struggles helped me with mine. Thank you, your generosity is truly appreciated.

I'd originally planned to write everyone who donated a story. Most are animal people and animal stories I can write. (Okay, and one pirate story.) But my brain is just fibro fogged and not cooperating. I have vague ideas but they're just refusing to connect. The stories may appear over the months upcoming, I really hope they do.

My friends make my heart sing. Thank you!  


Thursday, March 20, 2014

[Rambling Story] Turning Canada's finest into a cart horse.

(Random RCMP officers)
Standing in line at the grocery store for the self-checkout, a member of Canada's finest comes up behind me.
"Lorna!" says this handsome Mountie.
I turn and smile, "Yes!"  (Me so social.)
"We miss you in Cultus." He says. "Where are you living now?"
I have to assume he's one of the RCMP who was (still is?) assigned to the check-point that appears most summer nights on the road into Cultus Lake.  I tell him my new locale in Chilliwack.
"That's a good area, some thefts and car vandalism, but little violence."
'Bloody cop' I think. "I like it. I can walk to all the important places like Tim Hortons."
He looks down at me. "Is that more than you're supposed to be carrying?"
I look down at my basket. "Uhm, yes?"
He sighed and held out his hand. I meekly hand over my basket. He is only carrying some coffee and carrots. (Maybe he has a bunny to feed? Obviously the coffee is for a lagomorph.)
My turn comes up at a till, so he carries it over and says 'wait for me' and goes back to the line to wait his turn. I'm a good girl, I cash out, I put stuff in bags, I carry them to the end and wait for him, putting the bags down. (Okay, only MOSTLY a good girl, but I couldn't just block a till.) He cashes out and picks up my bags. "Where'd you park?"

"Around the corner. It's just less stressful, there's always spots there." Its a bit further than the other parking spots, but no fighting to find one, no "argh, I can't see if there's people walking behind me" and no people suddenly driving behind you as you try to back out, etc etc. I can't turn at the waist, backing up is similar to backing up in a pickup with a canopy on.
And so, he carried my groceries to my car and loaded them in the passenger side. And let me tell you, if you want to get double-takes in your direction, have a member of the RCMP carry your groceries for you. "You're going to take two trips to carry them in, aren't you?"
"Sure!" I agreed with absolutely no sincerity. He just sighed. "Thank you," I said, quite grateful for the assistance.
"Not a problem. I'm going to pretend that you'll carry them in one at a time, just like I pretend that you don't think speed limit signs are vague guidelines."
I looked my best wide-eyed and innocent, "Of course, officer!"
He shook his head and told me to take care of myself as he made his way off to his cruiser.
And that's about why no one will ever convince me that all cops are assholes, or corrupt, or whatever. I'm not saying all police are angels, but the majority just want to help people.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

[Bunny Fiction] Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Whisky humphed, his bowl was quite lacking in treats. Oh, sure, he had FOOD, but nothing he wanted to eat. The furless two foot had just stumbled off to bed and left him to starve. Stoopid humans, no appreciation for bunny needs. Why, he'd even let those stinky "foster" bunnies out into the garden first. Didn't the ape know who was boss around here?

Whisky had enough and let himself out of his pen. Enough was enough! If the human wasn't going to feed him properly, he'd just have to feed himself. Really, was it so difficult?

"Oi!" Anouska called, "Where are you going?"

"I am going to get food." Whisky replied, haughtily. Really, why did the stupid does always think they were such hot stuff?

"Gonna get us some too?" She asked.

"No." He sniffed, turning to present her with bunny butt for a moment before hopping off.

"This is why no one likes you!" She called after him before turning her own back on him.

"GOOD!" Whisky called back over his shoulder. He was perfectly happy being an only bun. If only his stupid human would learn this. Really, he was quite fond of his thumb owner, but sometimes the two foot was a bit thick about things like 'one bun household.'

Whisky stopped at the computer and looked up at the desk. Everything he wanted in one place, how handy. He nudged the chair out and took a few steps back before taking the leap up onto the seat. The chair sritched a little and he had to turn an ear towards the human's sleep den. (Really, how many dens did one being need? He had like four or five!) When the human made no indication he was coming to invesitage, Whisky scrambled up onto the desk.

"Hmph." He said, nosing around. "Car keys.." he mused as he tongued them. Nah, he'd have to cooperate with Anouska and her stinky mate to use them. He nosed the keys off the desk. "Paper, paper, paper.. And can I chew any of it? No. Mr Cranky Pants gets all cranky." The paper followed the keys, fluttering to the ground. "Ah ha!" He found the wallet he was looking for and tossed it open. He pawed at the cards until he found the one he wanted and grabbed it in his lips. This would be so much easier if he had front teeth. Damn tooth fairy had stolen his and claimed it was for his own good. Stupid tooth fairy.

With card in lips he turned back to the computer, kicking the mouse to bring it back to life. The TV had well prepared him for this next section. He tapped in the address to the browser, he went to the 'order' tab and typed in his selection with a minimum of bunny profanity as he mistyped. Nose typing was an underrated skill. He entered the credit card numbers, he selected "Box" under 'extras' and under 'special instructions' ordered "Just leave it on the step, extra box underneath." and hit send.

With the magic of the interwebs the request was sent off and he was informed he'd receive confirmation by email. With a sigh, Whisky turned to the magic of email and started a good grooming while he waited. The confirmation of food, extra box, and instructions were all confirmed and Whisky deleted the email. With a satisfied grunt he grabbed the card and shoved it back in the human's wallet and putting the wallet back where he found it. He then hopped down onto the chair, and then down onto the mess of papers. He thought the human really should be neater about these things.

Whisky ignored Anouska's grunts and complaints and hopped over to the front door to wait by the mail slot. He groomed his ears, and then his face, then his belly, and then gave up on it all and settled down for a nap. Humans were very slow about all sorts of important things and food was just about the most important ever. He was just getting into a nice dream about grass nomming when the noise of a truck arriving, a human walking up and putting something on the stoop, and then walking away again woke him up. Grumbling, Whisky waited for the stupid human to drive away again. He could smell the yumminess already.

Getting the door open required some acrobatics with drapery, the lounge chair, and one flying bunny. Shaking his head, Whisky looked out, then around and hopped out. While it was tempting to go for a long run, there was food to dispose of first. He wiggled the empty box to be a ramp and dragged the other box up before shoving the empty box after it. He had to admit, humans who followed orders without complaint were nice things. It was even nicer of his own human to pay for such exemplary service.

Closing the door was much easier than opening it, that was for sure! Whisky tossed the empty box into his enclosure to chew on later. He could build a fort or something. The other box, he nosed open and rubbed his paws in glee. An entire vegetarian pizza and it was all his! If bunnies could produce maniacal laughter, he'd laugh. Instead, he had to settle for butt wiggles and sinking mouth into cheesy, bready, goodness.

He was only a few bites in when Anouska called for a piece. Whisky, chewing madly, was quite happy to tell her to go stuff herself. She countered that without bribing she'd start thumping and get the human in here and then Whisky would lose his pizza and be in a world of trouble. Whisky glared at her, women were so high-maintenance.

Sighing, he hauled over the box to the foster cage and picked up a piece and tossed it over the fence. His aim was pretty lousy all things considered. It was hard to throw something half as long as you were, that was floppy, AND couldn't be grabbed by non-existent front teeth! So, it was a very pleasant surprise when the piece of pizza landed, topping side down, on Anouska's back!

"OW!" She yelped, shaking the piece off.

Whisky winced, it WAS kind of hot. "Sorry." He offered. While he would be reliving the glee of her getting bits splattered across her fur, he didn't wish her actual injury. Well, not any he didn't inflict personally, anyway.

"Hmph." She started in on her piece, her mate showing up soon enough to share in the bounty.

Whisky was happy enough to go back to his own pizza and nom through a piece and a half. His tummy very full he yawned and stretched. He had over half a pizza left. He looked over at the fosters and they were both looking rather hopeful. He sighed, he supposed it wouldn't kill him to share with the wretches, even if they hadn't said thank you for the first piece. Another piece went over the fence, this time landing with a splutch on the carpet. Eh, they'd clean most of it up. If the two foot got crankyt, it wouldn't be with him!

He stretched again, and closed over the box and dragged it into the food section of the human's warren. Getting the cold box open was always a difficult trick and generally not worth the effort, so Whisky just opened a cupboard and put the pizza in there to keep. He'd finish it off tomorrow night if the human didn't get all greedy-grumpy. Yawning, he was pretty happy to hop back to his own enclosure and close it behind him. He'd more than earned a nap.

He looked around. Boy, the living den was sure messy. The human should take better care of his warren rather than just leaving stuff lying everywhere!