Or at least, today's list.
I got up this morning to find evidence of someone having supreme poopy butt (aka "Yucky tail") and so someone got a butt bath. This someone didn't even put up much of a fight, which made me think she wasn't feeling altogether groovy. Suspicions of illness were raised higher when she licked my arm. Obviously she was out of her tree.
But as soon as I put her down on the towel beside the running water she gave me the "you will pay for this, human" look and thumped before giving me royal bunny butt. Apparently I didn't appreciate the true meaning of this since I took it as an opportunity to pick bits of hay off her butt.
She put up with the butt bath with a minimum of splashing.. for a rabbit. Which pretty much meant she soaked me from head to waist. Why do I bath her in the kitchen sink? The bathroom sink is too small for her dutchness and if I use the bathtub she'll go swimming and I'll never get her out again. I did consider hosing her down on the deck, but it's a bit too chilly and she'd just eat the hose.
(I jest, I'd never actually do that to a rabbit - I'd end up with a very ill, if not dead, bunny!)
Doesn't she look so cute while she's plotting my death? Should I have added a thought bubble of 'You have to sleep some time!'
..And if that wasn't enough, after putting her down in the bedroom to recieve 10 enthusiastic footflicks, I promptly went and cleaned her cage out. She got it nice and stinky and messy the way she likes it and I go and ruin everything. I have no consideration. WORSE I put the bowls back in the wrong order, so she hopped in, grabbed the pellet bowl to move it and fortunately I realized my error before pellets and water went everywhere.
Good help is so hard to find.