Sunday, October 15, 2023

[Bunny FanFiction] Sub-ins are sometimes required.

 

(The late, great, Mr Mick)

Yelling "BWAAAH!" and trying to jump back a foot when you woke up with a rabbit face about a centimetre from your eyeball was a perfectly reasonable response.  

Mr Mick, the rabbit in question, disagreed as he was startled, jumped away from the yelling viking, fell off the bed, and then thumped twice from the floor.

Kim clutched his chest and tried to get his heart rate and breathing back to normal.

Mr Mick hopped back up on the bed and gave his patented death stare. 

"Normally, you sit on my chest!" Kim finally managed.

"Eh." Mr Mick licked his paw and used it to groom his ear. "You were on your side."

Kim counted to ten in two languages.

"But now that you're awake.." Mr Mick said cheerfully.

"It's 0330." Kim pointed out.

"And you're awake! And probably not getting back to sleep right away!" 

"Rabbit logic at it's best." was the muttered observation as Kim pulled his pillow over his head.

Mick stuck his nose under the pillow, "You hear me in your head, I don't think that'll help."

"It'll make me feel better. Maybe I'll suffocate." 

If rabbits could roll their eyes, Mick would roll his. Instead, he headbutted Kim's shoulder. "This would be quicker if you just cooperated."

"Accept the inevitable?" came the grumbled reply.

"Exactly!" Finally, the human was starting to get it. 

Kim pulled the pillow off his face and put it behind his head as he flomped onto his back. "Fine."

"Great! So I need you to give good luck to Lorna's hockey team." 

Kim gave the rabbit a hairy-eyeball look.  "I'm not a rabbit."

"That's fine! I'll just shed lots of fur around here, and you can throw it about for luck." 

"Two things." Kim started then stopped. "Three things," he corrected. 

"I'm all ears." Mick said, giving his ears a shake. He wasn't one of the blessed lops who could wiggle their ears.

"One, why can't you do it?"

"Because the games don't start til 9pm at best, and I need my sleep." 

"You're a ghost! You don't need sleep!" Kim protested. 

"Do too." Mr Mick said firmly. 

Kim sighed. "Two, seven pm there is three am here."

"Okay." Mick wasn't sure how this was relevant information.

"I occasionally sleep at three am."

"That's okay, you don't need to." 

Kim's eye twitched. He shouldn't ask.. he shouldn't ask .. "Why is your sleep more important?"

The reply was predictable. "I'm a rabbit."

"THREE, you're a ghost, your fur disappears about two hours after you do."

"Huh." Mr Mick actually thought about that."I guess I could shed a bunch .. no, then it'd be gone before the second period."

Kim was surprised he may actually have won this one.

"I could borrow some from a Duchess or Titch, but intent matters." Mick mumbled to himself, "Hmm."

Kim reached under his bed and fished out the memory foam pillow with microfiber covering and placed it on the bed between himself and the wall. Mick absently hopped over him to lounge on it.

"I wonder if gerbil luck would work.. they're up at all weird hours.." Mick continued to muse, "No, gerbil luck is useless luck."

Kim closed his eyes. He could tune out a grumbly rabbit well enough, he'd had lots of practice. The joy of being a rabbit's "best human friend."  He was almost asleep when the rabbit in question decided sleeping on a human was more comfortable than a pillow.

Fortunately, that was another thing he'd learned to sleep through.